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Wednesday, March 14, 2012

♥ planning 21st.

planning a 21st is actually insanely time consuming.

i've looked at around 50 venues, sent out at least 30 emails. looked up balloons, caterers, drink menus...

i was super behind in uni work last week as a result, and i'm slowly picking up everything else again this week...

trying to attend 8am lectures because ilecturing becomes extremely time consuming.

i feel so busy! like i just hardly have any time. and really, the whole organizing 21st thing is actually wearing me down, there is actually a lot to do - and josh is too busy to help.

uni this sem is hard too. even though i'm only doing two units. NS is insane. I've done all the lectures but feel like I've absorbed nothing. Gotta get through those notes - they seem to be helpful. Gotta do that soon...

I don't know, despite everything and being really busy with stuff, I don't feel too bad. It's like I know it's going to be okay. Just gotta keep on top of things and not fall behind or let myself get overwhelmed.

It was good to hang out with my ex-tute today. We went to one of their houses and made home-made woodfire pizzas. It was very chill and I'm glad I went - because I was debating whether I should study instead. But I think it was a really good opportunity to spend time with some med kids.

RAWR.

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dt
11:02 PM

Monday, July 25, 2011

♥ lazy

slept in til 1pm today.


felt so good.


been a busy few weeks! will update in more details soon-ish.


uni in a week! eek.

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dt
4:42 PM

Friday, July 1, 2011

♥ busybee

well it's been pretty nonstop since uni ended! oh it's so good not having to study.


been working.

going out for dinner.

catching up with people. 

went ice skating.




played uno.

played monopoly.




played taboo.


oh and yesterday josh and i took this little one to the zoo... hehehe.

such a cutie.
unfortunately, my arms are killing me from carrying him... man, he's grown up heapsss.

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dt
5:32 PM

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

♥ lazy

i've been super lazy about the posts.

well actually, not so much lazy, more so busy.

i've been working heaps... got lots of different things on at night (esp with CNY and all that). 

and i just haven't really had that much time for myself..

i was meant to go to a church event tonight but i opted to stay at home and rest.

it's been a busy few weeks since coming back from cambodia, and i need to make sure i rest - i don't want to be starting uni all tired and exhausted.

i still need to enrol and sort out things like oaktree, laptop, senior first aid, injections etc...
and i still need to do a proper reflection of cambodia and also on the past year....

yup lots to do! so little time.

tomorrows my two years with josh, and i'm hoping it will be a relaxing day....

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dt
9:43 PM

Friday, December 24, 2010

♥ hectic

the lead up to this christmas has been absolutely hectic.

no rest. completely on the go. so many things to do. so many things to buy. so many things to organise.

i am completely unprepared for this trip.

but lets see if i can pull myself together in the next two days.

*heads explodes*

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dt
6:00 PM

Thursday, December 9, 2010

♥ shoes, suncream and flowers

well today i met up with joshfu for brekky - dimsum and then we hit harbor after to do a bit of shopping

i bought my secret santa present for danielle's christmas party (so happy with the present *big smile*)

and bought myself a top and two pairs of shoes for an absolute bargain.

originally i bought this pair of canvas laced white shoes thinking i'd bring them to cambo.. but they're white.. and i kinda like them.... and i don't know if i want to bring them there to get dirty anymore =[

we actually ended up shopping for quite a while (i didn't realize) and then i had to rush to babysitting while josh rushed to work (i think he ended up being late.. oops)

zeke today was quite good. not as active as last time *PHEW* haha and he warmed up to me quite quickly

we went to the park after grace had left.. and he wouldn't wear his hat! he kept taking it off..
and when i tried to put suncream  on his face.. he kept asking for MOREEE and MOREEE suncream, pointing and trying to grab the suncream bottle lol...

moreeeeee... moreeeeeeeeeeeee?

he seemed to like the other hat better and stopped taking it off which was good

nomnomnom

anyways he is quite the giggler. when he was on the swings and i tickled him everytime he reached where i was standing he'd giggle.. and when we were playing pikaboo on the playground with the walls and stuff... he is quite a bundle of laughter that one...

ahh but when huy came home. he was so excited! as huy swung him around and tickled him, he let out such a uncontrollable loud laugh/giggle which was super duper cute! that laugh he let out... it was amazing! the kind that reflects such immense joy and happiness. it was such a pretty sight *sigh*.

picked up mum and came home to a beautiful bunch of flowers from the boyfriend for our *counts* twentytwo months.

i love the lilies <3

on the way home from picking mum up i had a splitting headache. i think it might be from the lack of sleep, dehydration or maybe i'm getting sick.

so yes, early night for me tonight. with work bright and early tomorrow morning in the city

slightly overdoing it i think, but aiming for a more cruisey week next weekkk..

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dt
10:07 PM

Friday, September 17, 2010

♥ busy week

sunday.
skipped church and continued to work on 2209 literature review in the morning, went to cambodia 'compulsory' meeting at 230, then straight to uni to continue working on the assignment. moved from scibry to mcl at around 6... then ended up going home at around 9/10ish. slept at 5am - latest i've ever stayed up for an assignment i think.

monday.
woke up at 8ish to get to uni by 9. drank my soup outside science cafe while chris read through my lit review. group meeting from 10am, handed in lit review at 11:45am, assessed lab debate 12pm, home to recover from lack of sleep. watched an awesome ep of criminal minds while painting my nails with some opi, suzie says feng shui.


remembered how much my dog loves smackos. no joke. the commerical doesn't lie. 
jacko goes wacko for smackos.

tuesday.
woke up... watered the plants, started dad's car, played with the dog, fed the dog brekky... off to uni i went, picked up kfc on the way for the bf and myself. waited outside physics for josh to finish class to give him his food, bumped into chris who was on the way to class. went to my stats class, then MCL to work on stats assignment. home for tutoring.

wednesday.
woke up, went to uni, picked up red rooster on the way for the bf and i. met up with him to eat, the straight to MCL to work on assignment again. i hate when MCL is completely booked out - all the computers are not even being USED. i don't know why they don't leave one block free -___-" followed josh to reid for about 15 minutes, until rob called me and said it had unbooked as it had just passed 12pm... worked on assignment, stat class at 2, tute at 3, camped at MCL all night with these two guys that i befriended from my stats class. while one went to pick up some equipment or something, i went to dinner with rob...

it's really confusing because there are three robs i know this semester, two are in my stats class (asian rob and tall rob) with one of them also doing psyc (tall rob), and then there's the other rob whose doing psyc and is in my lab (white rob) and i did the debate with. but yeah, so i have these three robs in my phone address book, and i keep accidently messaging / calling the wrong one.. zzz. 

so anyways, asian rob insisted we went to grilled because he dislike broadway :( and wanted to eat proper food.



the meat pattie thing is quite healthy o___O...
the chips are good!

uhh bacon and cheese something something burger

looking at their production line style reminded me of something we learnt in mgmt about specialisation and when you do the same small thing over and over again (e.g. spread the bun with sauce) it gets boring, repetitive and job satisfaction decreases.

production line at grilled

adam joined us back after picking up his thingo and then we camped at MCL til about 1am.

this is adam. in MCL. at 1am was it?

thursday.
woke up a bit after 11... reached uni at 1ish... called work to ask if i could come in later... went to visit lecturer for assignment help... went to reid to photocopy stuff and bumped into helen who was heading to work and i asked her if she needed a lift since she worked in the same shopping center as i... still had a bit of time so went back to mcl for a while then left to go to work... it was quiet so i asked if i could leave early. went home, cooked rice, showered, packed lunch, fed the dog, made tea, left to uni. camped til just after 2am. went home, slept at 3am

friday.
woke up at 9:30... reached uni at 11:10am. went through stats assignment one last time before handing it in, worked on stats lab for that week. went for lunch at 1pm with adam and asian rob. $8.50 asian buffet... not far from uni either. errr food wasn't awesome. but $8.50 buffet? what do you expect?


went back to uni, printed a map of how to get to the airport at eng. called chris who just finished class and was about to head into the city. so figured i'd might as well tag along since i had an hour to kill. waited for him, drove to nb, walked around looking for mooncake [SIGH. surprised it was quite hard to find the type i was looking for]

walked him to k3g for his haircut. picked up this mooncake that i had settled on while walking back to the car.


pretty proud i made it to the airport from the city. considering i've never driven that route before. google maps on your phone is so handy. uber hate traffic though. cars were barely moving on tonkin.
ate some mooncake while waiting for parents at the airport. picked them up.. drove into that "pick up" bay to see my dad's worried/horrified  face at the front/side bit of the car. kinda freaked out thinking i had dented it unknowingly. but it was because the tyre was flat. when we got home dad checked it and it had a nail in it... [PHEW it was the day my parents got back and not while i was driving  home from uni at 2am haha]

anyways. parents are back. YAY for homecooked meals. and new shoes. and no more needing to feed the dog and water the plants. *hugs parents* you really learn to appreciate them when they're not around and you have to fend for yourself.

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dt
9:49 PM

Thursday, August 19, 2010

♥ exhaustion

i couldn't get up this morning. so i skipped my two uni lectures and opted to sleep in. i knew it was going to be a full on week but i thought i could handlle it.

SMA dinner tuesday night. the place was really pretty, cept it was so cold and it was outdoors!


the food was meh-ish, and i was pretty tired and grumpy tbh =/


but it was good to see my boyfriend's presentation thingo. if i think about it, i don't see him talk in front of an audience like... ever =/

on other news i got a haircut.

before


and after

doesn't look that different huh? but its so much lighter haha like i was washing my hair yesterday and there was hardly anything to wash! so yes i went to top image again (instead of k3g) because they open at 9am xD and the lady there is pretty nice... so i asked her to do something different (but not too extreme because i'm too scared lol) so she said my hair was flat :( so she was going to add volume with short layers. but yeah she made it look good when she blowdried it... the only problem is today... =X i don't know how to make it look the same bahaha.

also went for dimsum yesterday with the boyare girls! varn's going to china for a year! bahaha she's so funny, like complaining about the street ally in northbridge... when she's going to china...... eRrr...... lol


finally got a photo with the artwork outside mums office without looking awkward xD

anyways, quite a relaxing morning to get some energy back into me... sighh... work soooooooon.

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dt
12:58 PM

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

♥ busybee

RAHHHHHHHHHHH

GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

things are busy! and has been for the past week or so.. and is getting busier by the look of things...

now that i've decided to take up KAIROS, that means wednesday nights are gone. tutoring tuesday night, work on thursday nights. lifegroup on friday nights. monday is usually my chill night with criminal minds (however this coming week i'm visiting a lions club)... and that leaves, well, the weekend!

in a way, i'm kinda glad i'm not working as much as i use to now...

assignments are coming soon SIGH. and i'm already behind in keeping textbook notes and readings!

:(

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dt
11:14 AM

Friday, February 12, 2010

♥ sleepless

it's now 6:15am... and i've been awake since 4:30am.

i'm usually a decent sleeper. at least i like to think so. not as good as josh though, he pretty much konks out (even when on the phone with me!)

i blame this time partly to the fact that i slept in til like noon yesterday... but josh seems to think i have sleeping issues and wants me to see a doctor..... zzzzzzzz this is what happens when you date a budding doctor, they make a big deal out of not so big things... haha

but anyways, i know i am stressed. when i told vodafone my 'availability' i was not expecting them to roster me EVERY SINGLE AVAILABLE DAY. so now i get no rest. not happy jan. 

i'm hoping that my hours will ease up once we get a new assistant store manager. esp because my manager at reddot is going away for a month and need me to cover here and there.. i can see all my study time being chomped on at the moment.... zzzzz

i think i shall socially exclude myself for the next few days, to get some rest. and try to get my hours cut at vf. hopefully they dont even need me, but just stuck me there to give me more hours (but really, i don't want more hours zzz)

anyways. adding to the collection, in time for vallies day... haven't done so for a while!

her name is Adidas Kundo I, size 3 US.


cute huh?

yes, it was time for another girl shoe, the ratio between boy : girl was quite uneven. it was also time for a size other than a 2 US (which seems to also have an uneven ratio to all the other sizes put together)

anyways. now it's 7am. work in 1hr 45min. oh the joys of life.

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dt
6:59 AM

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

♥ busyBUSYbusy

i  haven't been blogging much lately.. but really. not much has happened.

work. work.. and uhh... work.

my 'date' with josh yesterday consisted of....
a movie (the invention of lying) which we saw his lil cousin with his friends sitting at the back (slightly awkwardddddd, it looked like we were there on purpose to keep a eye on them ahaha),
lunch at betty's cafe (goooood burger hey!) with a rock paper scissors to eat the last wedge (not because we wanted it, but because we were too full to eat it - josh lost, of course, with his paper and me and my scissors),
a stop by innaloo shops which resulted in a fight about clothing sizes (sounds stupid i know but ended up being a very silent drive back to his place, and it all just sorta exploded in his driveway with lots of tears...)
anyways, after we sorted that out, we played monopoly with matt.. and zmgshhhhh talk about the longest game EVERRRR. i was really winning early on too =( i had like half the properties. then traded and got like three or four monopolies? including mayfair and park lane or something??? yes as you can tell, i rarely play monopoly ahaha, and i'm not too good at it either. in fact the only times i've ever played a proper game of it was twice, both at josh's house.
we stopped by the beach for like half an hour before i had to rush to the train station to get to work on time! and that was my day in a bombshell.

on other news. went to the dentist today. had to get a filling. and gotta go back again for another... T__T far out. it was the first time i went to this dentist though, i usually go to the school one. but i'm too old now =(

well i'm working for the rest of the week. morning and night for both thurs and fri. next week i've got tuesday off, but i've got to somehow meet up with joshyen who's back from syd for a wk + eunike who's back from indo + adrian AND drop by chris' bday at kings park AND head to reddot at 5:30pm for work.

so anyways. as you can guess, i've been over doing it, once again. i am alive. i am fine. but i am tired.

work at reddot last night, weeknight trading - man it is QUIET, we closed early. but still stayed back to clean. but yeah... i dont think anyone knows we're open! which is good, for me at least. However as it rapidly approaches Christmas that might change. I can't believe we're open EVERY weeknight for the rest of the month (excl pub hols).  So it's been VF or RD... every day or night.. and so it will continue to be, at the look of things.

the vf people from induction were trying to find a night we could all catch up.. and i'm practically not free all the way til new years.

but yes. this is my life at the moment. i apoligise for neglecting you all =(


Josh & I @ Abortech Christmas Party

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dt
11:17 AM

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

♥ induction @ VF

i think i am slightly overloading myself...

i was meant to finish work at 4 on tuesday, but totally forgot... O__O it was like 5:15pm and kirk was like "weren't you meant to go home at 4?" and i was like =| !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

but linda (manager) changed the roster for me, so they're still going to pay me til close xD. how silly of me.

so today we began induction course at murray st. it was pretty cruisey. i have a feeling this week has just been information overload (with more to come) but we learnt about networks and the towers and stuff today.

made some pretty cool friends. i realize i can come across as a bit overpowering sometimes, unintentionally of course =/. must tone it down, esp since i already got the job, and don't even need to 'prove' myself or anything!

anyways so induction is wed thurs fri. thurs (2moro) i got work at reddot afterwards. fri i got FREE afterwards. sat will prob drop by karrinyup to get skirt altered. and find some black work pants... sunday is church and beach mission meeting. and the next week i'm working 5 days. kimchee night on the tues. SU induction course on the wed, uncle francis' 50th on the fri, and amazing race on the sat, church & eriks bday & church together on the sunday.

I AM TIRED.

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dt
9:14 PM

Friday, October 9, 2009

♥ 2busy4u

i was only in charge for the last hr at work but i had responsbility of counting the last till which was down $58. sigh, hate when that happens when i'm in charge, because i wonder if they'll lose trust in me if it's always down when im in charge. it's so not my fault though, i counted the money three times to check it. sigh! wish the counter girls were more careful.

i've got heaps of hours nxt wk cauz they're doing a refit ~ 20hrs. yay for money x) finally some hours! no tests nxt wk too..

coming home from work i looked into the dark blue sky. and saw some stars. the moon wasn't there though. but when i looked up i knew it was somewhere, you just couldn't see it.

my boyfriend's been pretty busy lately. it use to be me the busy one but now it's so role reversal. he's always studying on skype or in the library with his friends. which is great for uni, but i wish there were more hours in a day. sitting by myself in the library studying is just so lonely. but he doesn't like to study with me, because we dont do the same course so he can't ask me questions x) and plus, even if we did the same course i doubt i'd be any help anyways xD

on the road to finding some study buddies... because i find when i just go to the library and sit down with whoevers there we just end up talking. where as if i set fixed study session times, maybe we'll get study done?

even if it's not people in my units.. like studying with chris last sem worked pretty well.

but yeah idk if it's really studying or not i need. or just catching up x)

either way, must make more use of my spare uni breaks. i shall make a hour by hour timetable in attempt to be more organised.

exams are kinda soon =/ and it's 1am so i should go bed now.

'til next time

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dt
1:01 AM

Saturday, September 12, 2009

♥ t h r e e

yipeeeeeee, finished psyc report :) just need to get someone to read it, so i'm bringing it to chuch tomorrow for nathan to read... and hopefully some other people too ^^

argh, but chem midsem... 30% is SO MUCH. for 35 multiple choice questions! thats like 0.85% per question!!!!!!!!!!!!! =[ gah. but at least its MCQ and marks aren't taken off if u get them wrong (like last sem gah-ness)

and i only got 66 as my final mark for chem last sem =( and i really need to be hitting that 75+ / distinction line this semester to up my fgpa... instead of making it go down! but chem will prob be my lowest mark this sem x)... like last sem ahaha, i shouldn't be happy about that!

sigh, uni marking is so slow, i really want my hbio essay back =( and my stats mark (even though i dont think i did that well)

the next week will be pretty busy to begin with... psyc report due & psyc lab & chem mid sem all on monday... i hope i can wake up early =[ because my sleeping patterns are a bit wack (yes, slept at 3am yest)...
weds i've got hbio lab, so must rmb to do the prework on tues...
thurs we're going for more letter dropping i think...
fri i'll prob go uni to study then sma then driving, then tutoring, maybe dinner?, then asia cocktail.
saturday is tracy and laps wedding!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! eek, so excited, must figure out what i'm wearing mmm :).

time for bed i think!

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dt
11:27 PM

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

♥ uni kicks me up the butt

gahz0rs.

*destresses*


uni related :

hbio quiz tomorrow (4%) on the urinary and digestive systems.

hbio essay due next monday (15%) on familial hypercholesterolemia.

uh. remind me again why i'm taking human bio?!

stats test next thursday (10%)

psyc report (20%) due 14th sept - after mid sem break

chem mid semester exam (30%) also on the 14th of sept

another stat test in week 11 (10%)


non uni related:

ev & kelvins wedding = 29th aug - still not sure if im going...

tracy's hens = 5th sept

father's day = 6th sept - zmgsh?!

asia cocktail = 18th sept

tracy's wedding = 19th sept - WHAT AM I GOING TO WEAR?!?!?! what for daytime AND what for nighttime???!

VIC = melb/ballarat for zonta on the 25th sept - 27th sept

note to self : APPLY FOR TISC by 30th sept!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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dt
8:32 PM

Thursday, July 23, 2009

♥ first wk of sem 2

tomorrow will complete the first week of uni for semester two.
and wow, getting use to waking up relatively early, is a pain.

i've been late to every lecture (except wednesday, when i started at 10pm, rather than 9pm)
but really.. what is with traffic in the morning?! today was especially bad... =____=" took me more than an hr to get to uni... gah. i miss sleeping in already.

well my units this semester are... stats (maths), organic chemistry, psychology II, human bio II.

now.. i didn't do human bio I, so im slightly struggling with the terminology... and where everything is. everyone says that i'll be fine, that i'll catch up and that i'll get use to it, but to be honest i'm worried and wondering if i should switch / drop. i mean in one way, i know i can't avoid it - eventually i'll have to do it for bed. but in another way... i dont know if i can get a distinction for it, and if i can't it means my gpa will drop, which will lower my chances of transfering. so i'm sorta torn in two i guess.

psychology II is good, the lecturer is pretty good. interesting at least. since i've done semester one, i now know to study off the book (since the exam is based on book and not lectures, because most of the lectures aren't always relevant, but interesting and fun all the same)

stats... i heart maths. but so far stats has been pretty =/.. its basically just words on a slide. no working out stuff or anything =( but hopefully it gets better. the lecturer has quite a strong accent, i think its german.

chem.. hmm supposingly this chem is harder than last sem which is a major worry cauz it was my weakest last sem. but so far it seems ok. i guess he starts with the basics though, so i gotta make sure i keep up and buy the book (and actually read it) and do all the problems and ask questions when i dont understand stuff.

anyways.. other random thoughts:

+ i've been quite bitchy/judgey lately, well josh points out anyways. bad habits creeping back on me. will have to be more careful and wary of the things i say...

+ sometimes what you want and what you don't mind are two very different things. but i guess its important to be content and satisfied.

+ i expect my boyfriend to not be selfish and be able to share me with my friends without getting edgey. as i should do the same back. but sharing isn't always easy, though i think i find it easier than he does.

+ i seemed to be getting a bit more annoyed easily lately, maybe i'm more edgey that i think

+ oh today i creeped into my bf's lecture. it was a 1 hr 45min lecture. and i walked in with 30min to go. and my attempt to be discreet (by going by the back down) failed. she stopped talking and looked at me and asked me if i was a med student. and if i was in the right class. and i just looked at her blankly. and then she explained how they have been getting lots of law students coming in and out. yes. everyone stared at me and some laughed because they knew i wasn't haha. about 5 minutes later another girl walked in and sat nxt to me in the back row. obviously not a med student, but the lecturer didn't stop to ask her questions. but she did throw some looks at her haha.

+ gosh, i must walk funny or something. i have a hole in the back of my boots. phew they were only 10 bucks. yeah the back of my boots kept scraping along the ground, maybe the bottom bit isn't high enough, or maybe i just walk funny that i lean my heel too far back. it lets water in if i step into puddles. so its kinda pointless considering i still have to avoid puddles while wearing boots. its warm though.

+ i am fat. my boyfriend has fun poking my fatty stomach. i know i've gained weight. it's winter. plus i often go into phases where i don't actually care so much. hahaa, it's good to know my boyfriend will still stick by me, despite being fat. i wonder if he'll still like poking my stomach when im super fat like when im pregnant, however, i dont think thats too good for the baby.

+ today i worked. mainly recovery. the store looks good. hehe, also my manager mentioned rotating thurs nights in a 1 to 3 rotating basis. hence one thurs my manager will do it, the the next thurs the senior will do it, and the next thurs after that will be me. i think i get alternate saturdays now. which is good, i think every sat might be too much. but at least i know i'm getting at least one shift a week =)

+ lighthouse launch tomorrow. nysf district selection sat (oh judging will be fun!). umat wed. 18th party on sat. night service on the sun. zonta dinner on wed.

+ josh is coming over tomorrow! for dinner. haha.

+ having friends in every class has its pros and cons. it's great. because you have company and u can study together and ask questions. but i guess i don't make as much of an effort to make more new friends. haha. but i think its ok, because most people in 2nd sem already have their lil friend groups. and my mum always complains i have too many friends already. once she told me to unfriend them because i spent too much money on bdays etc xD.

anyways thats all for now. i should sleep. otherwise i wont be able to get up in the morning againn. and i'm quite exhausted.

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dt
10:45 PM

Thursday, July 2, 2009

♥ i can't do anything about the past, but i can about the future!

woah, the beginning of this week went by so sloww but the rest of it is just flying by.

11 days without my boyfriend, and i've survived haha. i've had to stop myself from posting blogs where i'm like "ARGHHHHHH i miss hiim" because, that would just look... attachy and dependant. xD and don't worry, i AM independant =) even though i do miss him.

its just different i guess, usually i'm the busy one who has to cancel on outings or conversations because i've got things to do or other commitments. now i'm sorta getting a taste of how it feels to be on the other side. and it's a great lesson really. makes me appreciate him more for always understanding and sticking by me, despite the many times where i didn't have much time for him.

i got good news yesterday, i opened a zonta letter saying that i won districts for the young women in public affairs award =) last year i won at club level (had to fill our an application with questions on the world & about advancing the status of women worldwide, went for a 45 minute interview, and did a 5 minute speech on my role model) and then my application got forwarded to district level (there's 31 international districts) and yeah i didnt have to do a thing (but wait!)

it's fantastic =) i get US$1k and possibly get to go to melbourne to speak at district 23's conference! so yes, i'm very blessed. praise God. I'm heading back to my club in august to speak to them about what i've done for the past 12 months.

i was extremely happy when receiving this news (as u can imagine) but shortly after sharing it with my mum, it didn't take her long to throw me a line about winning all these things, but failing at what was important, which was my TER.

sigh, i'll be honest and it really cut me at first, to the point where i could have gotten really angry at it. but i let it go. it really makes me teary just thinking about it.

you know, the kinda feeling where you'll never live this down. and like my parents will never be able to let go of it. and it doesnt help me. it doesnt encourage me. in fact it does quite the opposite.

if only they understood how they affect me....... but the thing is, even if they didn't say it, i'd know they think it anyways. because thats how my parents are, and i think most asian parents.

today, on the way home from work, in the car dad asked me how i won the one thousand. and even though he didnt say it, at least i felt like he was proud of me. i kinda realized my dad's like that, he doesn't really say things heartfelt haha. in the car to the bus station (this morning) while i ate my poptarts in the car, my dad was like "where's your water". i told him it was in my bag. and then i started thinking, i dont know why, but it made me think about how my dad says things sometimes... i guess he's just not very good at expressing things haha.

this past week has been a kinda big week for me. i've learnt to let go of a few things. things that i wasn't sure i would ever be able to let go. but i've learnt that i need to let go, that i need to forgive and that i need to move on.

the past is the past. it's not something u can change. ahh, but the present, the future... thats a different story.

you know. i would try to forget some things, i would try to let it go. but it never worked because, when some things happened, it would just evoke emotion in me about past events. sometimes i would hold someone's past against them. but who i am to do that? you know, when we sin, and we ask and accept forgiveness from God, and we realize that Jesus took all our sins on the cross, God doesn't use our past against us. when He looks at us, He doesn't see our sins, because Jesus already paid the price for them.

So, to those people out there. Who, if you asked me a week ago, i would have told you that i hated absolutely. I forgive you. Even if your not sorry, and even if you don't care, or even if you don't know how much i hate(d) you for the things you did to me / people who are close to me. I'm not going to all of a suddent try to befriend you, because then my motives would not be right. But i'll stop avoiding you. And i'll stop giving you evils. and I'll stop bitching about you. And I'll try to smile at you when i see you. because when i look at you, i'm not going to hold you past against you.

But yes im human, so forgive me if i make mistakes =)

it's time to be a better person!

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dt
11:15 PM

Thursday, May 21, 2009

♥ sticking to the diet

the other day i was sitting down in the food court at work

and these three women sat down. they already had a baby and i think they were trying to lose the fat that you gain when you pregnant (you know?)

anyways i overheard them talk about salads and food...

and after a while, one of them sat down with a salad from sumo salad - very healthy, good job right? but then she opens a 600mL bottle of coke.

and i started thinking to myself... "uhh, dude, if tryin to lose weight, whats the point of gettin a salad if ur just gonna drink coke?"

it just seemed, so... stupid at the time.

but when i draw parallels to my own life.

i have a dream, i have a goal... i have a way of getting there. a plan maybe.

but do i really stick to my plan... you see, at least that lady GOT a salad... where as in my situation, its like i walk straight past that sumo salad place...

maybe i looked through the window - but i don't bother stopping to buy anything, because those red rooster chips smell so much better... because they're cheaper... easier to eat on the go...

sometimes i don't even realize i walk past that salad place, because my eyes are so set on red rooster. i say i "want" to reach my goal (in this situation - losing weight) but, i dont.

is it because i can't find the time? because i don't have the money. or its just not that appealing.

all these lame excuses...

does it really just come down to how much i "want" it.
is it really as simple as - if you want it, you'll work for it. don't people get distracted? too busy? things don't go according to plan... it doesn't mean that i don't want it.

anyways, this blog entry will sound really stupid if you don't know what i'm talking about - don't worry, i'm not actually on a diet, and i will never pay $10 for a salad... but as i said, its drawing parallels... i dont even know if i make sense.. zzz

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dt
11:46 AM

♥ when when when!

there is never a good time.

it seems that things always pop up... commitments here, commitments there.... last minute things here, last minute things there...

when will i learn to prioritize? to keep the load on my plate at a steady (and low) level.

when will i learn to stop overloading myself? overworking myself? over-expecting myself?

when will i become a better person? a more organised person? a more neat person?

when will you get sick of me?

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dt
12:14 AM

Saturday, May 16, 2009

♥ that kid

i am that kid.

you know. that kid who is the goodie two shoes. the one your parents call when they are worried about you. when they think that you'll listen more to me, that you would to them.

haha. only in some cases though, i can also be perceived as the one who causes trouble

so u know how facebook has those tagging things... well this is what i've been tagged as:
the genius, the whip wielder, the good little church girl, the hard worker, the goodie two shoes, the tiny dangerous one...

anyways. things have changed. i don't really feel like that kinda person anymore.

im not a genius... haha, whip wielder, reminds me of my dictatorship days =P am i still? idk xD probably. the good lil church girl? haha.

----

edit: i wrote that post yesterday. now that i look at it. i just want to finish saying that... people think i have the perfect life. but my life is far from perfect.

p.s. sighhhh, whyyyy did people vote no for dst...

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dt
3:32 PM


♥ theGrumpyToast ;



      theGrumpyToast is very grumpy. Beware, this toast bites.

      welcome to my blog
      yes, the grumpy toast is back,due to popular demand haha...
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      happy reading =]
      dt.


    1 Peter 5:6-7 (The Message)
    So be content with who you are,
    and don't put on airs.
    God's strong hand is on you;
    He'll promote you at the right time.
    Live carefree before God;
    He is most careful with you.

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