Thursday, November 25, 2010
♥ overdoing it?
just watched the greys anatomy ep where everyone was dealing with george's death.
there are five stages of grief.
denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance
- greys anatomy
well today i slept in til like 11:30am... it felt so good to sleep.
today's been a lazy morning / day. kinda glad i didn't get called into work (even though i was hoping for it last night)
holidays are kinda flying. and i'm been overdoing it already. quite exhausted. and i haven't even been working that much (like ONE day). phew i already have money for my trip, but i was meant to make up for eating into my savings...
sigh, need to sort out stuff for my trip too.. that means shopping! oh and games... and yes must not forget about my testimoney =X
but yes, even though i haven't been working i always seem to find things to fill my day. still haven't cleaned my room out.........
so yes, a busy start to the summer holidays hmm
p.s. my mark appeal resulted in a +6% for my report.. *happy face*
p.s. my mark appeal resulted in a +6% for my report.. *happy face*
Labels: overload, summer holidays
4:15 PM
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
♥ dt + green tea ice cream = a happy dt
green tea icecream
YUM!
i blame the girls for getting me into it..
but i found out the japanese restaurant in broadway sells it for $2.50 and it was really creamy hey.
and then the next day i went looking at kongs also in broadway, and they sell an italian version, which was really nice also for $2.50
and i remember last time i went with a few of the girls to that asian restaurant on the corner and got some there to.
eventually, i would have tried all the green tea available in broadway! that shall be my mission for the rest of the semester. should be pretttyyy easy :)
so anyways today i had my first maths test, and i really did a lot of practice questions in preparation, so i felt good with the amount of work i did. alas i did not study the theory aspect however.....
so i made that part up, but writing something is better than nothing (as long as what i wrote doesn't make me sound stupid =/...) so hopefully i still end up with a decent mark..
now i must admit, i am getting slightly stressed with my workload. and i feel sorta stupid about it, because at this point of my life, i am actually not doing that much (outside uni and work) in comparison to my high school days. so these stress levels are not what i would expect. i think it has to do with motivation, rather than just a time issue.
so it's mid semester break next week... and despite being a nice holiday for most, unfortunately that is not the case with myself =[...
it will consist of a lot of easter related events / church services, two lifegroups, two birthdays, quite a few days of work, yoty state finals, and of course studying for all my tests and doing all my assignments.
two tests (psyc & stats) and one assignment (stats) due the first week back, another assignment (psyc lab report) due the week after... not the mention more assignments and tests to finish the month of may.
SIGH.
oh and did i mention? my parents have departed on their little adventure... leaving me with my sister. and you might all be thinking that this is great and tthat i love it, but really when my parents are gone, my sister is just as (if not more) protective than my parents... GREAT!
and she always leaves me to do all the watering of dads plants, and feeding the dog and all that....... -.-"
anyways, i should stop procrastinating and complaining and do something useful.
sigh, could really do with some green tea icecream right about now...
Labels: holidays, icecream, maths, overload, parents, sister, uni, work
10:13 PM
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
♥ busyBUSYbusy
i haven't been blogging much lately.. but really. not much has happened.
work. work.. and uhh... work.
my 'date' with josh yesterday consisted of....
a movie (the invention of lying) which we saw his lil cousin with his friends sitting at the back (slightly awkwardddddd, it looked like we were there on purpose to keep a eye on them ahaha),
lunch at betty's cafe (goooood burger hey!) with a rock paper scissors to eat the last wedge (not because we wanted it, but because we were too full to eat it - josh lost, of course, with his paper and me and my scissors),
a stop by innaloo shops which resulted in a fight about clothing sizes (sounds stupid i know but ended up being a very silent drive back to his place, and it all just sorta exploded in his driveway with lots of tears...)
anyways, after we sorted that out, we played monopoly with matt.. and zmgshhhhh talk about the longest game EVERRRR. i was really winning early on too =( i had like half the properties. then traded and got like three or four monopolies? including mayfair and park lane or something??? yes as you can tell, i rarely play monopoly ahaha, and i'm not too good at it either. in fact the only times i've ever played a proper game of it was twice, both at josh's house.
we stopped by the beach for like half an hour before i had to rush to the train station to get to work on time! and that was my day in a bombshell.
on other news. went to the dentist today. had to get a filling. and gotta go back again for another... T__T far out. it was the first time i went to this dentist though, i usually go to the school one. but i'm too old now =(
well i'm working for the rest of the week. morning and night for both thurs and fri. next week i've got tuesday off, but i've got to somehow meet up with joshyen who's back from syd for a wk + eunike who's back from indo + adrian AND drop by chris' bday at kings park AND head to reddot at 5:30pm for work.
so anyways. as you can guess, i've been over doing it, once again. i am alive. i am fine. but i am tired.
work at reddot last night, weeknight trading - man it is QUIET, we closed early. but still stayed back to clean. but yeah... i dont think anyone knows we're open! which is good, for me at least. However as it rapidly approaches Christmas that might change. I can't believe we're open EVERY weeknight for the rest of the month (excl pub hols). So it's been VF or RD... every day or night.. and so it will continue to be, at the look of things.
the vf people from induction were trying to find a night we could all catch up.. and i'm practically not free all the way til new years.
but yes. this is my life at the moment. i apoligise for neglecting you all =(
Josh & I @ Abortech Christmas Party
Labels: boyfriend, busy, christmas trading, dentist, overload, reddot, vodafone, work
11:17 AM
Thursday, November 19, 2009
♥ i am..
physically and mentally exhausted.
i just want to go to sleep and not have to wake up.
i have decided not to commit to anything anymore. and attempt to make more 'me' time. because right now, i really need it.
11:28 PM
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
♥ induction @ VF
i think i am slightly overloading myself...
i was meant to finish work at 4 on tuesday, but totally forgot... O__O it was like 5:15pm and kirk was like "weren't you meant to go home at 4?" and i was like =| !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
but linda (manager) changed the roster for me, so they're still going to pay me til close xD. how silly of me.
so today we began induction course at murray st. it was pretty cruisey. i have a feeling this week has just been information overload (with more to come) but we learnt about networks and the towers and stuff today.
made some pretty cool friends. i realize i can come across as a bit overpowering sometimes, unintentionally of course =/. must tone it down, esp since i already got the job, and don't even need to 'prove' myself or anything!
anyways so induction is wed thurs fri. thurs (2moro) i got work at reddot afterwards. fri i got FREE afterwards. sat will prob drop by karrinyup to get skirt altered. and find some black work pants... sunday is church and beach mission meeting. and the next week i'm working 5 days. kimchee night on the tues. SU induction course on the wed, uncle francis' 50th on the fri, and amazing race on the sat, church & eriks bday & church together on the sunday.
I AM TIRED.
9:14 PM
Friday, August 7, 2009
♥ i am blessed
the past few weeks have been extremely difficult for me.
+ the stress of the lead up to the umat
+ the many trials and difficulties that put a strain on my relationship with josh
+ the feeling of seeing my first cadaver
+ the stress of beginning uni again, and picking up a subject that i have no background knowledge of
+ the fear of disappointment from my zonta club, once they hear of my setbacks
+ my parents going away, and the dog not eating, or having to spend much of my night doing things like washing or feeding the dog or preparing my lunch for the next day - instead of studying
+ the sickness and exhaustiveness that comes when you get ur period
there has been nights where i have just cried myself to sleep. nights were i have questioned God about His plans for my life. nights where i could hardly sleep. nights where i would just konk out due to pure exhaustiveness.
Chris Tomlin's music, has provided me with so much comfort these past few weeks. I listen to the album, Arriving, on shuffle and loop and repeat on my phone, josh's ipod and my laptop. I can't even pick one song to stick up on here, because i rekon they are all just awesome. Oh, here's one, i like how they put the words and images on this one..
as i reflect on the past year, and more so the past six months, i've realized some things. some things good. some things bad.
i believe i've become too emotionally dependant on my boyfriend. i believe i haven't been managing my time wisely. i believe i have been to quick to judge people.
but on a better note... i believe i've reached financial freedom. six months ago i was maybe $700 in debt. today, i am now a source for borrowing money from my family. i also believe i've been eating healthier. well slightly. im getting there, but i dont think i've had kfc for a while. hehe. and when it comes to regular exercise... i still haven't reached there yet. but i will! haha.
Late september, I will be flying to VIC to speak at the Zonta International District 23 Conference. Actually at the beginning of the dinner on Wed night, Alison had told me that the district couldn't jusitfy flying me over there for a 10 minute speech. But yesterday i recieved the good news, that after i left, the club decided that they would cover my expenses to fly me over there. I will probably leave on a Friday, and get back in time for uni on the Monday. so praise God =)
Well today i was meant to be working, but they took me off because a lady came in for the whole of the week to cover my manager who went for training. This will give me a good opportunity to get some things done.. e.g. clean my room... xD and catch up on the lectures i missed yest - oh dear, when buses go on strike... it sucks =(...
oh i bought some pretty boxes from work too (to put my shoes in) i bought the second and last one. the first one i've got a smaller version (well actually its joshs but for some reason its sitting in my room) and the third one i've got a big white version already from my birthday from lauf.
i think i have a gift box fetish. or it might just be because i work at reddot. xD but they're pretttyyy awesome.
oh oh i got my lab coat for chem xD its got the uwa logo on it ahahaha. i will take a picture of how nerdy i look in it and post it one day.
meantime... off to clean my room i go... but first i will get something to eat... mmm
+ the stress of the lead up to the umat
+ the many trials and difficulties that put a strain on my relationship with josh
+ the feeling of seeing my first cadaver
+ the stress of beginning uni again, and picking up a subject that i have no background knowledge of
+ the fear of disappointment from my zonta club, once they hear of my setbacks
+ my parents going away, and the dog not eating, or having to spend much of my night doing things like washing or feeding the dog or preparing my lunch for the next day - instead of studying
+ the sickness and exhaustiveness that comes when you get ur period
there has been nights where i have just cried myself to sleep. nights were i have questioned God about His plans for my life. nights where i could hardly sleep. nights where i would just konk out due to pure exhaustiveness.
Chris Tomlin's music, has provided me with so much comfort these past few weeks. I listen to the album, Arriving, on shuffle and loop and repeat on my phone, josh's ipod and my laptop. I can't even pick one song to stick up on here, because i rekon they are all just awesome. Oh, here's one, i like how they put the words and images on this one..
as i reflect on the past year, and more so the past six months, i've realized some things. some things good. some things bad.
i believe i've become too emotionally dependant on my boyfriend. i believe i haven't been managing my time wisely. i believe i have been to quick to judge people.
but on a better note... i believe i've reached financial freedom. six months ago i was maybe $700 in debt. today, i am now a source for borrowing money from my family. i also believe i've been eating healthier. well slightly. im getting there, but i dont think i've had kfc for a while. hehe. and when it comes to regular exercise... i still haven't reached there yet. but i will! haha.
Late september, I will be flying to VIC to speak at the Zonta International District 23 Conference. Actually at the beginning of the dinner on Wed night, Alison had told me that the district couldn't jusitfy flying me over there for a 10 minute speech. But yesterday i recieved the good news, that after i left, the club decided that they would cover my expenses to fly me over there. I will probably leave on a Friday, and get back in time for uni on the Monday. so praise God =)
Well today i was meant to be working, but they took me off because a lady came in for the whole of the week to cover my manager who went for training. This will give me a good opportunity to get some things done.. e.g. clean my room... xD and catch up on the lectures i missed yest - oh dear, when buses go on strike... it sucks =(...
oh i bought some pretty boxes from work too (to put my shoes in) i bought the second and last one. the first one i've got a smaller version (well actually its joshs but for some reason its sitting in my room) and the third one i've got a big white version already from my birthday from lauf.
i think i have a gift box fetish. or it might just be because i work at reddot. xD but they're pretttyyy awesome.oh oh i got my lab coat for chem xD its got the uwa logo on it ahahaha. i will take a picture of how nerdy i look in it and post it one day.
meantime... off to clean my room i go... but first i will get something to eat... mmm
Labels: boyfriend, chemistry, God, hbio, life, overload, parents, reddot, relationships, umat, uni, work, worn out
9:04 AM
Monday, August 3, 2009
♥ no news is good news
there's a common saying that is
So i was listening to the news today, and the firs thing to catch my ear was the kyle and jacky o incident. actually at first the news segment was just about kyle being sacked by aussie idol... but i searched up the radio incident on google news... and was shocked. appalled. disgusting. horrified. angry.
Now. i must hit myself back into reality sometimes and realize that the media can sometimes exaggerate things... and that everything that is said, is usually biased.
But a mother who would question their 14yo child's sex life on a popular radio station while having previous knowledge of the fact that her daughter was raped when she was 12... it horrifies me.
And really. The girl who's family claims got severely poisoned by a KFC twister and ended up quadriplegic... really puts me off KFC.
A few hours later...
Oh another note, I've been sick. PMS has tired me out. My body is exhausted. Having my Mum away does not help. I want chicken and sweet corn soup =(
I'm behind in uni work (from taking week of uni for umat prep), again having parents away does not help. Gotta feed the dog... wash clothes... cook / make meals... gotta take the bus everywhere. It's very time consuming. Wow i rely on my parents a lot... ...
I guess you could say i'm struggling at the moment.
Zonta dinner is on Wed. oh gosh, i haven't even wrote a speech yet. I'm also disecting a pigs heart for Wed's lab. Again... not prepared for that either.
About 10 minutes ago, i was quite frustrated because my student didn't know the area of a triangle was half of base times height..... >___> argh im going crazy.
"no news is good news"I don't actually remember where and when exactly i first heard it. But today i am reminded of it.
So i was listening to the news today, and the firs thing to catch my ear was the kyle and jacky o incident. actually at first the news segment was just about kyle being sacked by aussie idol... but i searched up the radio incident on google news... and was shocked. appalled. disgusting. horrified. angry.
Now. i must hit myself back into reality sometimes and realize that the media can sometimes exaggerate things... and that everything that is said, is usually biased.
But a mother who would question their 14yo child's sex life on a popular radio station while having previous knowledge of the fact that her daughter was raped when she was 12... it horrifies me.
And really. The girl who's family claims got severely poisoned by a KFC twister and ended up quadriplegic... really puts me off KFC.
A few hours later...
Oh another note, I've been sick. PMS has tired me out. My body is exhausted. Having my Mum away does not help. I want chicken and sweet corn soup =(
I'm behind in uni work (from taking week of uni for umat prep), again having parents away does not help. Gotta feed the dog... wash clothes... cook / make meals... gotta take the bus everywhere. It's very time consuming. Wow i rely on my parents a lot... ...
I guess you could say i'm struggling at the moment.
Zonta dinner is on Wed. oh gosh, i haven't even wrote a speech yet. I'm also disecting a pigs heart for Wed's lab. Again... not prepared for that either.
About 10 minutes ago, i was quite frustrated because my student didn't know the area of a triangle was half of base times height..... >___> argh im going crazy.
6:10 PM
Thursday, May 21, 2009
♥ sticking to the diet
the other day i was sitting down in the food court at work
and these three women sat down. they already had a baby and i think they were trying to lose the fat that you gain when you pregnant (you know?)
anyways i overheard them talk about salads and food...
and after a while, one of them sat down with a salad from sumo salad - very healthy, good job right? but then she opens a 600mL bottle of coke.
and i started thinking to myself... "uhh, dude, if tryin to lose weight, whats the point of gettin a salad if ur just gonna drink coke?"
it just seemed, so... stupid at the time.
but when i draw parallels to my own life.
i have a dream, i have a goal... i have a way of getting there. a plan maybe.
but do i really stick to my plan... you see, at least that lady GOT a salad... where as in my situation, its like i walk straight past that sumo salad place...
maybe i looked through the window - but i don't bother stopping to buy anything, because those red rooster chips smell so much better... because they're cheaper... easier to eat on the go...
sometimes i don't even realize i walk past that salad place, because my eyes are so set on red rooster. i say i "want" to reach my goal (in this situation - losing weight) but, i dont.
is it because i can't find the time? because i don't have the money. or its just not that appealing.
all these lame excuses...
does it really just come down to how much i "want" it.
is it really as simple as - if you want it, you'll work for it. don't people get distracted? too busy? things don't go according to plan... it doesn't mean that i don't want it.
anyways, this blog entry will sound really stupid if you don't know what i'm talking about - don't worry, i'm not actually on a diet, and i will never pay $10 for a salad... but as i said, its drawing parallels... i dont even know if i make sense.. zzz
and these three women sat down. they already had a baby and i think they were trying to lose the fat that you gain when you pregnant (you know?)
anyways i overheard them talk about salads and food...
and after a while, one of them sat down with a salad from sumo salad - very healthy, good job right? but then she opens a 600mL bottle of coke.
and i started thinking to myself... "uhh, dude, if tryin to lose weight, whats the point of gettin a salad if ur just gonna drink coke?"
it just seemed, so... stupid at the time.
but when i draw parallels to my own life.
i have a dream, i have a goal... i have a way of getting there. a plan maybe.
but do i really stick to my plan... you see, at least that lady GOT a salad... where as in my situation, its like i walk straight past that sumo salad place...
maybe i looked through the window - but i don't bother stopping to buy anything, because those red rooster chips smell so much better... because they're cheaper... easier to eat on the go...
sometimes i don't even realize i walk past that salad place, because my eyes are so set on red rooster. i say i "want" to reach my goal (in this situation - losing weight) but, i dont.
is it because i can't find the time? because i don't have the money. or its just not that appealing.
all these lame excuses...
does it really just come down to how much i "want" it.
is it really as simple as - if you want it, you'll work for it. don't people get distracted? too busy? things don't go according to plan... it doesn't mean that i don't want it.
anyways, this blog entry will sound really stupid if you don't know what i'm talking about - don't worry, i'm not actually on a diet, and i will never pay $10 for a salad... but as i said, its drawing parallels... i dont even know if i make sense.. zzz
Labels: busy, food, money, motivation, overload, relationships, umat
11:46 AM
♥ when when when!
there is never a good time.
it seems that things always pop up... commitments here, commitments there.... last minute things here, last minute things there...
when will i learn to prioritize? to keep the load on my plate at a steady (and low) level.
when will i learn to stop overloading myself? overworking myself? over-expecting myself?
when will i become a better person? a more organised person? a more neat person?
when will you get sick of me?
it seems that things always pop up... commitments here, commitments there.... last minute things here, last minute things there...
when will i learn to prioritize? to keep the load on my plate at a steady (and low) level.
when will i learn to stop overloading myself? overworking myself? over-expecting myself?
when will i become a better person? a more organised person? a more neat person?
when will you get sick of me?
12:14 AM
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
♥ worn out
i feel kinda worn out.
i feel drained. overloaded. sleepy.
it seems that everything is just coming at once. it doesnt even feel like i'm turning 18 tomorrow.
assignments... labs... birthday parties... cell group...
i wish i had more time. less assignments. more fun. less stress. more life.
God, show me how to liveeee a life full purpose and life. because i dont feel that way at the moment.
i feel drained. overloaded. sleepy.
it seems that everything is just coming at once. it doesnt even feel like i'm turning 18 tomorrow.
assignments... labs... birthday parties... cell group...
i wish i had more time. less assignments. more fun. less stress. more life.
God, show me how to liveeee a life full purpose and life. because i dont feel that way at the moment.
9:27 AM
Sunday, April 19, 2009
♥ You of little faith, why did you doubt?
Matthew 14
i think in some ways i'm like peter.
i see the wonderful things God does in my life, i see how he carries me through every situation...
and u know... i walk on water...
but then i start to see the world through my eyes.
i start to see "reality"... then i start to lack faith. i dont know i can handle it. i think its too much.
and i begin to sink into the water.
I always ask God to help mee... I always ask Him where He is...
but it's not that God isn't there for me.
but rather, i am somewhat lacking in faith.
I focus on the wrong things... I doubt.
I need to change my perspective, because i'm continuously sinking whenever i'm stressed out and overloaded.
Changed.
Faith.
Life.
25During the fourth watch of the night Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. 26When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. "It's a ghost," they said, and cried out in fear.
27But Jesus immediately said to them: "Take courage! It is I. Don't be afraid."
28"Lord, if it's you," Peter replied, "tell me to come to you on the water."
29"Come," he said.
Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. 30But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, "Lord, save me!"
31Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. "You of little faith," he said, "why did you doubt?"
32And when they climbed into the boat, the wind died down. 33Then those who were in the boat worshiped him, saying, "Truly you are the Son of God."
i think in some ways i'm like peter.
i see the wonderful things God does in my life, i see how he carries me through every situation...
and u know... i walk on water...
but then i start to see the world through my eyes.
i start to see "reality"... then i start to lack faith. i dont know i can handle it. i think its too much.
and i begin to sink into the water.
I always ask God to help mee... I always ask Him where He is...
but it's not that God isn't there for me.
but rather, i am somewhat lacking in faith.
I focus on the wrong things... I doubt.
I need to change my perspective, because i'm continuously sinking whenever i'm stressed out and overloaded.
Changed.
Faith.
Life.
4:02 PM
Saturday, April 18, 2009
♥ let go, let God...
You know when there are times... you look back at your life... and you see how fortunate you've been. how blessed you are. how silly you were to have worried at all those times, without realizing that God would always pull you through.
And you think to yourself... wow, life has been so good to you - God has been so good to you.
Then sometimes happens, to ruin your outlook. A trigger... that hits you back to reality.
The reality of assignments - and the lack of time...
The reality of friendships - and the fights or arguements...
The reality of relationships - and if they're going in the right direction...
The reality of the future - and if you're doing what you should, in order to get where you want.
And you fall back into this hole... where you know you'll eventually get out of it... but at this very moment, it doesn't feel like it. you want OUT now! but you dont end up getting what u want.
It's okay. I know later in life, I will look back, and I will see how God carried me through... like He does everytime.
I need to let go, and let God.
I need to begin to stress less... to understand that I do not do this on my own ability. But I have God. Every step of the way.
When i begin to look at my life, and see these assignments, tests and friendships... I begin to worry. stress. freak out. because I can't handle this on my own. I don't have the ability to get through this alone.
And it's awesome. because I'm not alone.
but at this very moment. i don't feel very awesome. help me God!
And you think to yourself... wow, life has been so good to you - God has been so good to you.
Then sometimes happens, to ruin your outlook. A trigger... that hits you back to reality.
The reality of assignments - and the lack of time...
The reality of friendships - and the fights or arguements...
The reality of relationships - and if they're going in the right direction...
The reality of the future - and if you're doing what you should, in order to get where you want.
And you fall back into this hole... where you know you'll eventually get out of it... but at this very moment, it doesn't feel like it. you want OUT now! but you dont end up getting what u want.
It's okay. I know later in life, I will look back, and I will see how God carried me through... like He does everytime.
I need to let go, and let God.
I need to begin to stress less... to understand that I do not do this on my own ability. But I have God. Every step of the way.
When i begin to look at my life, and see these assignments, tests and friendships... I begin to worry. stress. freak out. because I can't handle this on my own. I don't have the ability to get through this alone.
And it's awesome. because I'm not alone.
but at this very moment. i don't feel very awesome. help me God!
Labels: assignments, faith, God, life, lifegroup, overload, stress, uni
12:17 AM
Thursday, December 25, 2008
♥ its christmas.. already?
wow time sure flies
it's already 16 minutes into christmas
but it doesnt feel like it.
in fact i feel exhausted. tired. sleepy. worn out.
i think i need sleep.
badly.
it's already 16 minutes into christmas
but it doesnt feel like it.
in fact i feel exhausted. tired. sleepy. worn out.
i think i need sleep.
badly.
12:16 AM
