Wednesday, September 9, 2009
♥ who i am now
compare the me of a year ago, to the me of now.
and i see a striking contrast.
a year ago, i never imagined i would own a pair of skinny jeans.
a year ago, i never imagined i would be the international district winner of zonta ywpaa.
a year ago, i didn't think i would own more than 20 tshirts.
a year ago, i didn't think i would be dating the boy that i thought was arrogant and proud.
a year ago, i was strong minded, confident, emotionally stable and just... strong in general.
i had values. beliefs. morals. and i stuck by them wholeheartedly.
slowly i have changed. i still have those values, beliefs and morals. my wardrobe may have increased. my fashion may have changed. my love life may have changed.
but what i find the most worrying... is that i'm not as strong anymore.
a few years ago, i remember telling my mate, how all the guys i had dated were so emotionally dependent on me. and how i had such bad taste because i'd always pick them!
and now i look at myself.
and I'VE TURNED INTO THEM.
how insane. i don't like it.
how could i look so disgustedly at the things people did a year ago.. and find myself doing it now.
how can i attempt to point out the speck in the eye of another, without taking out the log in my own.
but more than that... i've become someone i never imagined i would become.
i've become someone i never wanted to be. and i look at myself today and feel disgusted.
i feel like a hypocrite.
i feel like i've lost who i was, and turned into who i am.
i need a break. i need to stop. to lose who i am. and find the me 'i want to be' again.
what happened to me?
i'm a wreak.
p.s. please don't give me the cheer up phone call or convos. i just need to be left alone. thanks.
Labels: bad days, boyfriend, clothes, exbf/exgf, life, me, pain
6:07 PM
Thursday, June 4, 2009
♥ frustration
you know when your stressed because you have an exam in two days...
and when you're trying to study because you really need to study...
and you've got headphones on with music playing to try to relax you...
but the only thing you can hear is the high pitched laughs from the room nextdoor.
yes, that is definately frustrating.
2:34 PM
Saturday, May 30, 2009
♥ underwear from reddot anyone?
yesterday i realized that good days can turn sour really quickly.
making them turn back into good, is really difficult.
it takes time, and effort. but sometimes when u feel like crap, it's not that easy to turn things around.
anyways. i must share this. i had a customer today who told me that he wasn't sure what size underwear he was. he was holding a box of "calvin classics" a ripp of of calvin klein i think...
first, he asked me if we had changerooms, so he could try them on. and i was like "uhh no." then he asked me if we had any kinda room, just so he could see which size he was. and i said no again -___-" i mean geez, i dont think he got the point.. we're reddot man. who the hell buys underwear from us, let alone expects a changeroom to try them on?!
and then he asked me if he could return them if they were the wrong size. and i really plainly said no. because..... ew? health regulations man.
and then, i told him i'd go ask someone........ so i went to get jade, who's a transfer from another store, but when i was telling her abt the man i couldn't stop laughing.
she eventually came back to me after a while and she put her hand to her head in a gun suicide sorta action and i couldn't stop laughing. she told me that he had asked her if he could take it for 10 minutes, just to go to the toilets or something. and she was like "NO!"
ahahahahaa zmgsh? whats with customers now a days xD
making them turn back into good, is really difficult.
it takes time, and effort. but sometimes when u feel like crap, it's not that easy to turn things around.
anyways. i must share this. i had a customer today who told me that he wasn't sure what size underwear he was. he was holding a box of "calvin classics" a ripp of of calvin klein i think...
first, he asked me if we had changerooms, so he could try them on. and i was like "uhh no." then he asked me if we had any kinda room, just so he could see which size he was. and i said no again -___-" i mean geez, i dont think he got the point.. we're reddot man. who the hell buys underwear from us, let alone expects a changeroom to try them on?!
and then he asked me if he could return them if they were the wrong size. and i really plainly said no. because..... ew? health regulations man.
and then, i told him i'd go ask someone........ so i went to get jade, who's a transfer from another store, but when i was telling her abt the man i couldn't stop laughing.
she eventually came back to me after a while and she put her hand to her head in a gun suicide sorta action and i couldn't stop laughing. she told me that he had asked her if he could take it for 10 minutes, just to go to the toilets or something. and she was like "NO!"
ahahahahaa zmgsh? whats with customers now a days xD
5:33 PM
